teenage pregnancy affects all of us in some way. i was about 18 years old when i became pregnant with my first child. some times i wonder and think i should have waited and listened to my mom. growing up me and my mom weren’t really that close. but if i had to compare my mom and my dad and who i was semi close to i would say my mother. i don’t have the prefect relationship with my parents but i know in their heart that they love me and want nothing but good things for me. its not very often you will meet a parent that cares about their children like mine does. growing up i lived  in a very sheltered home. my parents were strict. i didn’t have sleepovers or i didn’t get to stay out late like my high school friends did. and at some point id wish that i could trade lives with my other friends because they got to do what ever they wanted and had nicer things than i had. but i look back and i wouldn’t trade my parents for the world.  you only have one mother and one father so make the most out of your relationship with them. i wish i could go back in time and erase all the lies that i told my parents. and running away from home. i regret not telling my grandmother before she passed away in Jan of 06 that i was okay i didn’t get to say good bye and everyday that hurts me sometimes i cry because i should have been their at least to her funeral. i was about 5 or 6 months pregnant at the time. i idolized my mother more because every since she came to America she always had a job never got laid off once. if it wasn’t for her then we wouldn’t have a roof over our heads. my father on the other hand caused my mother nothing but heart ache. he is a big time smoker and gambler. he was in denial like every other person who has an addiction. he would come home each Friday and gamble if not half his check sometimes his whole check away. leaving my mother with all kinds of bills to pay. there was guaranteed arguments in my house everyday. my parents have been married for 18 years. sometimes i wished my mother had left my father long ago and moved on with her life.  he caused my mother nothing but heartache and grief. after 18 years of marriage my father walk out on my one year old sister and i was about 16 at the time. i will never forgive my father for that. and ever since then my life changed for ever. thats when i met people offline which is a risky behavior. these days parents arent really tech savy but i advise any parent please dont have a computer in your childs room you want to be able to put it in the family room so that you can moniter your childs every move. at times i wish my mother didn’t get me the internet because it leds to nothing but trouble. thats when i met paul he is now my husband he is white and i am black he is 49 years old and i am 21 years old i met him on yahoo chat four years ago on cam. what i did was stupid i ran away from home and took the risk of getting hurt or worst. i guess at the time i wasn’t thinking. we now have a biracial son his name is paul also . and he is very funny.keep s you on your toes and he is very active. but a year ago he was diganosed with tof  congential heart disease  its a rare form of heart disease he had to have open heart surgery. it was a shock to me i cried and cried i was scared of losing him. i ask my self what did i do to deserve this. i thought my son was perfectly healthy i breast feed him for  22 months he had his surgery on  march 22 2007 . now he is doing real fine. i don’t want to talk about all the other details because it hurts to much still. well  now my mother she is remarried and  she has a husband that adores her to death. she is also taking care of my baby sister julie ann she is 8 years old i heard that she is getting real big and tall more than likely she will take after my mother because she is tall. my father is living in brooklyn just struggling  to make ends meet. he is a school bus driver for lindenhurst the same school district my sister goes to now. i keep in touch with my mother at least once a week by phone and my father every now and then. eventually i am going to take my son down to long island so he can see his grandparents caused they haven’t seen him in two years. i graduated high school in june of 2005 and now i am in college parttime . i will be going full time real soon so i can get my bachelors degree i am somewhat thrilled. life will change for the better . and the best part my education is free. i am in a grant funded program. so if i am lucky i will leave the university oweing no money. wel thats all i have to say about my life there is too much that has happened in my life i swear i could write a book about my life. gotta go.